Submitted by: Unknown
Careful there, girlfriend. One minute you’re getting some innocent grapevines draped across your backside, and the next thing you know, you’re this. Or worse, this.
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Heard it Through the Grapevine
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If This Tat Could Talk
Jovndøyr on Keep it in Your Magazines Kinseth on Do I Have Enough Piercings to … kindness on Keep it in Your Magazines Ry on Sexy Body: Ruined Jovndøyr on Straight From the Hood Jovndøyr on Glow Worms? Jovndøyr on Sexy Body: Ruined AL on Played in the Key of Razor… AL on Played in the Key of Razor… Ry on Happy Mother’s Day!
first?
I’ve never done that. My apologies. But seriously…where is the “Olive Garden” tag?
Yeah, I think you’re going to need that Olive Garden tag.
I don’t think these meet Olive Garden standards.
fruit of the loom..?
I didn’t know Olive Garden served muffin tops!
Good Lord! It looks like her hips are spreading out all over… uh… as these are public messages, perhaps I should say that’s not a flattering picture.
damnit, i was gonna make a muffin top joke… i think i will anyways… gross, who wants a grape muffin (top)
thats actaully kind of well.. hot.
*looks at comment… looks at picture… looks at comment… looks at picture* I’m going to have to go with no. No it isn’t. Trust me I’m a scientist and as the mega-awesome smart scientist that I am I have come to the conclusion that this tattoo is not hot, sexy or scrumptious in any way.
Joe may be referring to the woman, not the tattoo.
*hangs head in shame* Sorry Joe….
No, the woman ain’t hot either. Not from seeing 12″ of her back side.
The ‘Grapes Of Crack’!
What’s more horrible, the crayonesque execution or the fact the leaves look like poison ivy?
The fact that it’s completely off-center and she has grapes going into her butt crack.
God forbid she ever suffers from haemorrhoids.
Or an even worse thought – those grapes are coming OUT of her butt crack. Ewwww.
Blech!
is that wine dripping down her leg?
You remember Crayola markers, those big fat markers that had the sharp points on them? You could color nice, sharp lines with the tip and use the edges for thicker lines and to color things in. And after you did a couple of pieces for the refrigerator door they were dull and didn’t color evenly anymore. That’s what this looks like it was drawn with-well used Crayola markers.
That’s EXACTLY what this looks like.
That was my first thought. Especially the grapes.
This one looks like a redo, only doing it much, much wider, going over the same lines, and doing it in stages. They have no concept of depth and certainly do not know what real grape vines and leaves look like. I shudder to think what the grapes will look like by the time they get to those, but I’m guessing more like raisins. *twitch*
I’m actually pretty sure that that’s drawn on. So you’re right.
This looks like something that I drew in the margins of a notebook while not paying attention to my teacher.
“Heard it through the grapevine?” If you hear anything through this grapevine you better move…
no way this was done by a pro. normally when people get a friend to tattoo them, it’s a little thing on the leg, not a big piece in a very visible location. i despair
No kidding! My cousin keeps offering to give me a tat. I just keep putting him off. I don’t want to wind up on here! O.O
I wonder how much cash she has laid out to have the first round of lazer removal on the grapes and one leaf. It is like that saying about free puppies…there is no such thing as a twenty dollar tattoo.
What’s the saying about free puppies?
The thing that gets me about the majority of the photos of tattoos on here is that I can never quite tell whether they’re being displayed proudly or were just taken to prove that they’re legible to go on a waiting list for laser removal.
Removal of that mess would take many sittings and cause considerable scarring. Unless she becomes so sickened by having a tramp stamp that it causes her extreme emotional distress, she’d be better off finding someone who does epic coverup work. Sure, it would cost a LOT more than this crap did, but in the long run, still less than laser removal would.
*eligible
This looks like a kitchen wall stencil, circa 1994.
My god. There is nothing good about this tattoo. Nothing at all.
OMG there are bubbles frothing out of her crack! Eeeeew!
Those aren’t grapes, friends. They’re dingleberries.
Oh, look, she has piles.
A grape tramp stamp. Perhaps she’s trying to be “classy”.
The older the berries the sweeter the juice?
Diabeetus.
Uh…
While the position of the grapes is unfortunate, you guys realise you’re looking at a tatt in progress, right? A friend of mine has an almost identical tatt (better leaves, no weirdly positioned bunch of grapes) and she had it done in stages. Halfway through it kind of looked like this… unfinished.
yeah but it still looks like a shitty tattoo in progress. terrible good idea (i guess?) horrible spot, even worse artist. and honestly, a tattoo like that should not take more than 2 sessions. judging by the crappy line work over the previous shitty line work, this is already past its second session. a -real- artist would have this done in two sittings easily.
Whatever you do…dont pluck that bottom grape….jus sayin…
Saayyy…is that a raisin in your…oh, wait…that’s gross!!!
I actually know the girl who has this tattoo. its real, and it was one of her kids that drew it and she got a tattoo of it. this is the first stage, and she’s making it more elaborate
we look forward to the update once it is completed
Yeah, yeah. We see that in nearly every thread. In fact, it’s more common to see “I know this person” than someone saying “First.”
Pics are proof.
I noticed that too. It’s become a regular thing for someone to defend a tattoo by saying… “I know this person and that makes this tattoo awesome!”
you’re lying
No way! I know the person who knows the person and I can vouch for her/him.
Heard it Through the Grapevine…
I bet the sound had some nasty smell.
this isnt a tattoo. clearly drawn with marker and pens…
Clearly?
As the man who took that picture, I can tell you that the tattoo has been (slightly) improved.
The story is this: 10-15 years ago, her moron druggie ex-husband (from when she was young and naive) got himself a tattoo gun and thought suddenly he was Mister Artiste, and demanded she let him tattoo her. So she drew up a beautiful design and said “Okay, here. Do this on my lower back.”
The end result is what you see above; it looked like a 5 yr old with Downs Syndrome scribbled on her ass. For her birthday this past year, I knew the one thing she’d always wanted was to get that abomination fixed. So we took her to a tattoo shop here in Orlando. Three shops looked at it and said “Fuck that, there’s nothing we can do without doing a HUGE piece over it.”
Finally one artist (I can’t even remember the shop’s name) said he would do his best. The end result, after three and a half hours, is actually a LOT better than the pic above. He used better colors, did some shading, thickened the vines, fleshed out the grapes. It’s still not the greatest tattoo in the world, but it’s a fucking Monet compared to the original.
The final product is here:
http://i390.photobucket.com/albums/oo350/TomPalmer1979/tiatat.jpg
its a relief to know the original was done by a druggie scratcher.
It’s time to switch to old lady underwear.
Are we sure they are grapes and not “dingle berries”?
MUFFIN TOP!!!
I’ll just leave these memes here…
You gonna get graped.
http://cdn3.knowyourmeme.com/i/30359/small/you_gonna_get_graped.jpg?1260589737
Tentacle Grape?
http://www.japanator.com/elephant/ul/9098-tentacle-grape.jpg