Ugliest Tattoos: Bad, Awful & Horrible tattoos
 
 
 

Archive for December, 2009

Besties 4 LIFE!!!11!

Dec. 21, 2009

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ForeeeeverSubmitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

Why would you do this? There are much better ways to honor a beloved friend than getting a tattoo that makes her look like a deflated sock puppet or like she’s missing all her upper teeth. Try these on for size:

Funny Tattoos: Let’s make a sandwichSubmitted by: It’s a friend… via Submission Page

“Baby, you are the PB to my J.” And when the relationship goes south, you can always make up some other reason for your condiment tattoo. Like “This is my JAM, yo!” or “I am a great admirer of George Washington Carver.”

Funny Tattoos: Aye, but there's a moral to it.Submitted by: on my friends foot! via Submission Page

Tweedledum and Tweedledee
   Agreed to get matching tattoos;
For Tweedledum said to Tweedledee
   “You can always just put on some shoes.”
Just then Dee had a flash of sanity:
   “Why didn’t I think this through first?”
This silly idea assaulted his vanity,
   Because Disney tattoos are the worst.

Funny Tattoos: I give these tattoos 1 and a half starsSubmitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

Or you can always go with portraits of Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly in what I assume is an homage to Step Brothers. I haven’t seen Step Brothers and had no idea it was a zombie flick.

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It’s Only Because “May I Have the Pleasure of Your Company?” Didn’t Fit on His Knuckles

Dec. 21, 2009

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No, Dude. This Tattoo Will Totally Pay For Itself.Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

Awesome. And to think that I was beginning to wonder if my own knuckle tats would ever come in handy.

Funny Tattoos: What can I say? I’m polite like that.

Because they sure as hell don’t do me any good when it comes to telemarketers.

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Pink Cigars All Around!

Dec. 20, 2009

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Mother Fuckin Princess, YSubmitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

Eleanor Regis Rockafeller-St. John-Drummond-Willoughby and Austin Reginald Hepburn-Stuart-Forbes-Trefusis are pleased to announce the birth of their daughter

Grace Kelly Charlotte Rockafeller-St. John-Drummond-Willoughby-Hepburn-Stuart-Forbes-Trefusis

On Monday, December 20 at 10:00 a.m., weighing 109 lbs and sporting a large tattoo on her pelvis and a Diamonique navel piercing, both of which bode well for her future as a Reno stripper.

Mother and baby are doing well and sharing a six-pack of wine coolers.

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Bad Dog!

Dec. 20, 2009

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Caution: Dog PooSubmitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

This may seem incredibly immature and unsophisticated, but the other leg has three panels showing the accident victim watching a commercial on late-night television for one of those personal injury lawyers, filing a complaint at his state superior court, and winning $5500 in damages for his medical expenses and pain and suffering.

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There Goes His Mario Kart Record

Dec. 19, 2009

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Funny Tattoo - secondly, those boobs are weird even for video game dinos.Ink Spotter: Joonas

It’s been a long time since I’ve played any video games, so forgive me if I don’t remember at which point in history Yoshi got a sex change. But at least he—erm, she—seems happy with the results.

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You Say "SEX," But All I Hear Is "UGLY FONT"

Dec. 19, 2009

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Just In Case You Want To Remind Your Boyfriend What YouSubmitted by: Facebook via Submission Page

It’s not really true that men think about sex every seven seconds. But we do think about it plenty. Often enough that we probably don’t need a reminder. I wonder if this tattoo was considered with a couple other possibilities, like “BREATHING” and “PANCAKES EVERY SO OFTEN.”

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I Think This Baby Was the Night Janitor at My Junior High School

Dec. 18, 2009

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Funny Tattoos: But really, the money would have been better spent on his medical treatmentInk Spotter: Michelle B.

Look, not all babies can be Suri “Kitten Heels” Cruise, okay? Just because a kid looks like Brian Peppers doesn’t mean his parents aren’t allowed to honor him in the way they see fit.

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Someone’s Getting Knee Socks for Christmas

Dec. 18, 2009

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Funny-Tattoos-PantlessPortraitInk Spotter: Bob M

Some readers like to make a fuss when I post a tattoo that isn’t ugly, per se. And if you want to be a real pedant about it, the site isn’t called “Ugly Tattoos,” but rather Ugliest, a superlative that one could argue necessitates that there be only one tattoo on the site, since only one can be the ugliest of them all.

This one is for you. Next time you feel slighted because you haven’t gotten your daily dose of aesthetic displeasure, just come back and look at this tattoo. If they get any uglier than this, I don’t want to be around to see it.

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I Wouldn’t Walk Down the Streets of Hyderabad With That

Dec. 17, 2009

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Ctamel Toe
Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

It took me a while, but I finally get it. A dromedary, the provincial animal of Pakistan’s Balochistan province, tattooed onto the foot, a part of the body that is traditionally considered unclean in South Asian culture. A convoluted means of insulting Pakistanis, but an insult nonetheless.

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Protip: Don’t Use This for Your Match.com Profile Picture

Dec. 17, 2009

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The Transformation Is CompleteSubmitted by: dunno source via Submission Page

Man I hate it when this happens. You go in for a cover-up of the cheekbone tattoo that you got back in your wild-child days, but it’s not quite satisfactory. So you get than covered up with something even bigger and darker, and so on an so forth until your whole face is obscured by black ink and the floor of your trailer is covered with toxic chemical waste from your meth lab. Slippery slope.

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